That Crazy Wife of Mine   6 comments

Kimberly was in a mood yesterday, a “Life Is a Lemon” mood, so she blasted our living room with Meat Loaf.  On most days I totally agree with the sentiment, just not the volume, and not really the music.  Look at that picture on the left and tell me if she looks like a head banger to you?   Who knew?  I might have had second thoughts on our wedding day.  That and she likes the TV series Scrubs–openly and without shame, like it’s a normal taste.  She even forced me to watch Moulin Rouge with her.  Well, she asked me to, which is the same thing because: “loving husband.”  I would rather stand barefoot in the snow (which I incidentally did today since I had to move my car and was too lazy to put shoes on).

Besides her seriously bad taste in entertainment, she throws away perfectly good things, like dish-washing sponges before they’ve naturally disintegrated on their own.  I tell her to think of the starving children in China who have no sponges to wash their dishes with, but it does no good.  She claims they stink even after microwaving them (yeah, that’s a thing now).  I say, “I don’t smell anything,” and she retorts, “You wouldn’t smell it if the dog pooped behind the sofa.”  She didn’t actually say that, but she still had a point about my deficient olfactory nerves.

And speaking of behind the sofa, she’s a complainer.  About once a month she complains about the trash around my wastebasket at the end of the living room sofa.  I can’t quite reach it, so I kind of toss stuff in that direction, sometimes food, and some of the smaller stuff kind of sticks to the wall.  But hey, I clean it up, about once a month coincidentally.  I don’t go all commando-clean, like scrubbing the wall, but I pick stuff off with my fingernails.  I tell Kimberly to just avoid that end of the sofa and she won’t see it, after all, marriage is about compromise, right?

Hey, I’m not a barbarian–if it were dog poop behind the sofa I wouldn’t wait a month to clean it up.  Just sayin’.


Posted March 25, 2014 by janathangrace in Personal

6 responses to “That Crazy Wife of Mine

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  1. I’m shocked; shocked to hear she throws away stinky sponges!
    Time for Kimberly to make a guest appearance on this page? =)

    • I know, right?! Mind you, I rescue the sponges, use them for my power tools and stuff. I’ve tried getting her to write on the blog, but she’s resisted so far–maybe we need more pressure from readers!

  2. Her listening to Meat Loaf: response to “life is a lemon” kind of day, reminds me of my Dad watching John Wayne movies after difficult board meetings at his church. Didn’t need to ask him how the meeting went on those nights.

  3. When my nephew applied to the marines, he found out that generally women have a sense of smell 7 times more acute than men…it was a revelation to my husband and me and helped us understand some of our skirmishes…

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