Cloudy weather   4 comments

It has been overcast or raining here in Lynchburg for about 10 days now.  It makes life feel quite gloomy.  Many of you know that I have struggled with depression for over 10 years, though it has gradually grown better.  I now generally find myself on the positive side of life, but barely (like 55% positive), so it takes little to knock me below the line.  However, as I continue to grow out of depression, I find it takes less time to get back above the line.  Still, 55% yields only a 5% margin, so I have to live quite conservatively with regard to my emotional energy.  This means I lack the energy, intiative, and ability to often do things that most people consider just another ordinary activity or daily choice (answering emails, working on small projects, taking relational  risks).  I could force myself to do these things (as I did most of my life), but if I did, it would create an unsustainable lifestyle.  So (to get back to talking about the weather… as only I can do!), an overcast day may affect my emotional energy only 10-20%, but that is enough to make my soul feel dragged down by life.

Advertisements

Posted November 19, 2008 by janathangrace in Uncategorized

4 responses to “Cloudy weather

Subscribe to comments with RSS.

  1. hello again. I check in every now and then— usually when I should be working! — to see if you’ve posted anything. Yes, I can identify with holding on to that slim margin of just feeling ok. And I can identify with the weariness that makes the simplest things almost insurmountably hard sometimes. And I can identify with the cold damp weather seeping into your soul.so I’m sending you some love, like a warm puppy, to sit up next to you.loveMardi

  2. Thanks, Mardi.  Kimberly and I enjoy dogs vicariously by watching the animal channel.  We’ll probably get one eventually, but just talking about it at this point.  Love to you too.

  3. I totally understand the dark/cloudy day syndrone.  Having grown up in the sunny south,  i couldn’t pinpoint that the “down” days were related to weather….BUT you let the sunny south girl go to Moscow where ALL of Nov and most of Dec is completely foggy and dense heavy clouds and it is enough to comtemplete never coming out of a hole again. Moscow weather is more cloudy and rainy or snowy than anything i could have ever imagined.  (Hence another reason i now live back in NC!!) I could have never imagined that the weather could so adversely affect my emotional well-being.  BUT as those who lived with and around me would attest, IT DID!   So, give me a week of cloudy/rainy weather now and it takes several days to come back from the pit.  Thanks for sharing, cause until 2006 i had no idea WHY i suffered so…and it does so affect everything we do…even spiritually! 
    hope your days are getting sunnier and sunnier!
    Princess

  4. Well yesterday and today are absolutely delightful. and even the snow last week was beautiful.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

w

Connecting to %s

%d bloggers like this: